Memorial Day Update

Evening Füsters . . .

Quick post to note that tomorrow is Memorial Day. While this holiday always has a special association, this year it’s even more so given what’s been going on. We are on the cusp of 100K deaths here in the United States alone and that in and of itself is something we should not forget anytime soon.

COVID is not over. Be smart in your celebrations and maintain your distance from others.

While you take time tomorrow for yourself and your family, reflect that the Füste alone has many, many people working on the front lines. They do it every day, COVID or not, and they deserve a moment of your time.

Our count stands at:

20 Registered Nurses

3 Dispatchers

2 Paramedics

1 MD

1 Law Enforcement Officer

1 Firefighter

Memorial Day is traditionally a day to remember those lost in the military battles we’ve fought to maintain our way of life. Tomorrow should be more than that. Tomorrow should be a day to remember that some battles don’t have a clear beginning or ending and those that now fight them do so in the same streets that you drive every day, in the hospital ICUs and ERs and in the backs of ambulances that speed through the night to come to help you when you need them the most. Tomorrow, on Memorial Day, remember that you wear a mask out of respect for these people, you keep your distance from others out of respect for these people, you do what you can to keep COVID down out of respect for these people. They don’t have a choice in what or how they do things. You do.

And while it’s hard to think about a “game” on a day like tomorrow, it is typically a day of celebration and GG doesn’t want to strip that from you either. So, for Memorial Day, get your Doppelt Schmerzefüste done early and earn yourself a food and drink bonus for the day. With that you can still celebrate, raise a glass to those fallen in past wars and fighting the current ones and most importantly you can remember (and celebrate) all those who make your life what it is by doing what they do, each and everyday, in service to all.

And to those listed above and those that keep doing the smart thing to keep COVID under control, GG just wants to say thank you for all you have done and continue to do.

Griswalde Grolar

Week X: Rona Rescue Füste?

Alright, everyone, your cries of despair and self-disgust have been heard. GG’s been waiting to see if things would change and they’re clearly not going to anytime soon so it may be time for a first ever (Rona) Rescue Füste. Last Summer (which now seems like a million years ago) GG took an elite group of 16 Füsters through an experiment to push the limits of the standard Füste. GG is willing to look at something like that again, if it will help you get through the COVID-19 (newly gained pounds of flank meat) quarantine. How it’ll work is . . . same basic rules as Winterfüste but GG’s role will be scaled back in general support. You may only get an acknowledgement of your daily report every couple of days and the Bestenliste will be updated as he can get to it (this will be dependent on how many people sign up). Bonuses will be turned off until they’re not, homework is strictly on your own and there’s no “off day” so you can go all out on the exercise (first two weeks will be single punkte Schmerzenfüste only, as defined on the website, then two weeks Doppelt and two weeks Trippelt). And understanding the impact of everything going on right not, there will be no fee for this Füste. GG simply asks that at the end, if you found value here and in past Füstes, you donate something to the Go Fund Me account he’ll be setting up for the development of an app. After WF2020, GG swore up and down he wouldn’t do this again without an app but special times call for special considerations so here we are. If you want to be a part of the RRF, just send GG a text to his phone (707-779-8372; and yes, it’s turned back on and GG apologizes to anyone who texted him in the last two months and was met with a comm’s black hole and resulting existential crisis) saying you’re in and he’ll turn your WF Totemfüste back on. Day 1 will be this Wednesday, May 6th (so go ahead and have one last gross Rona induced blow-out on Cinco de Mayo). First report and initial weigh-in due on Thursday morning, before noon. We’ll go six weeks (and reassess at that point. If the “Stay at Home” rule is still in place, we may opt to extend (as we did last Summer), for those interested . . . either way, this will hopefully help you recover your Summer physique, even though the only person who may see you in a bathing suit this year is that weirdo squirrel that’s always hanging around in the backyard playing with his nuts and giving you the stink eye. Finalefüste will be June 20th, all things considered, and may or may not involve a gathering of sorts (dependent on whatever social contract we’re tied into at that point).

Hope this finds you healthy and Rona-free . . .

GG

PS . . . one item of outstanding WF business is the t-shirts. For obvious reasons and until further notice, t-shirts are stalled out at the local shop that GG was using. We’ll get there. Patience.

Week 9: And now we come to the last . . . .

Hallo Füsters . . .

It’s that time again. The final push. The fait accompli. Time to drop the hammer, finish strong, leave it all out on the Spielbrett as we bring WF2020 across the finish line. As usual, GG has no idea where the time went and can hardly believe we’re in the final week of game play (he’s not complaining; this was a rough one). Hopefully you left a little in the tank to bring your game home with authority. There’s only one thing GG hates more than a Krapfenfüste (yes, he got his first 🍩this Füste) and that’s a soft finish. So his personal challenge to you: den Schmerz bringen. You’ll have plenty of time to rest on March 8th.

• Your final homework audit is due by midnight tonight. And in case you weren’t keeping track, it’s worth +5p. WHAT?? That’s right. This was posted last week. Were you not paying attention? So, send GG video proof of completion of one Week 8 Qualkammer (click here for details). That’s a lot of bonuspunkte for a little bit of work. Get it done.

• The last and final new game bonus is on the Bonuspunkte page. Click here.

• The final Plankenfüste GBA is 2min for +3p. You got this.

• Drachen Slayage is in full effect! Don’t forget that this is worth +15p, an enormous amount of bonuspunkte. You would be remiss to pass on this opportunity and your place on the final Bestenliste will surely reflect what you do here. Four times a single workout parameter gets you the bonus. Let’s see what you’ve got!

• No homework this week. That’s right. Save your strength for the Finale Konfrontation.

• Tuesday is Super. Send GG a selfie proudly displaying your “I Voted” sticker to earn one last social responsibility +3p bonus (if you mailed in your ballot and you don’t have your sticker then you’ll need to be creatitve). You don’t get to bitch about things if you don’t vote.

• Some finer points on the Finalefüste day and event:

  • Unlike past Füstes, you must report your final day’s activity by noon on March 7th. Yes, the game continues to 5pm so there’s a little crystal ball work here. To be clear, GG will not accept a final report after 12:00pm that day. So, this means that next Saturday morning you will report, by noon, on the following:

    • Your final weight as of that morning (with a pic of the scale).

    • Your activity from Friday, March 6th.

    • Your expected activity for the March 7th through 5pm (yes, you’re on your honor here and GG will check STRAVA for same day Schmerzenfüste proof).

  • The Finalefüste event begins at 5pm. Please respect GG and your fellow Füsters and be punctual.

  • Two components to the dress code. The Finale Konfrontation is activity based, Please dress accordingly. Athlesure (“ahtletic leisure”) wear is most appropriate. Also bring a jacket as we may be outdoors and the weather is questionable for next Saturday. Each Gruppen is assigned a specific color shirt to wear as follows:

    • Eiskreaturen: White

    • Frostschreken: Blue

    • Schneedämonen: Green

    • Sturmangreifer: Grey

  • Food and basic drinks will be provided. Please bring a six pack or bottle of wine if you plan on drinking (and why wouldn’t you?). Hard alcohol is not allowed at this venue unfortunately but GG will not be policing flasks or plastic containers either so . . .

  • Did GG mention the Finale Konfrontation is activity based? Come prepared to work hard, get sweaty and beat-up and possibly confused and disoriented. This event is the real deal. You will be placed under stress. Deal with it. You are Füsters and exist on a higher plain than most. This comes with both benefits and costs. The effort put forth at the FK is one of those costs.

  • Please please please use a ride service if you’ll be drinking. This is very easy to do these days and you have zero excuse. GG prefers Lyft but there are a number of solutions here and absolutely no reason to drive home buzzed or intoxicated. There’s no faster way to get banned from future Füste events than for GG to have to wrestle your keys away from you and force Braunbär to put you in a compliance hold.

• GG has some travel this week that may effect posting updates to the Bestenliste (what’s new, right?). This Füste has been unfortunate in that regard but he’s going to do his best to get to daily updates on this final week. Be patient as you have been and GG thanks you for understanding that the Füste is not yet a self sustaining operation and that GG maintains outside employment like everyone else.

• Did you read this? Did you really? Then text GG your Finalefüste shirt color with Monday’s weekend report off to earn a +1p bonus.

• Oh, and there might be at least one Twitter based bonus opportunity this week so probably want to keep your eye on the interwebs . . . remember, the Twitter feed is posted right on The Füste home page. You literally have no excuse.

That’s it for now. Probably one final group communication on Friday but other than that, the game is yours to do with what you will on this final week. Respect yourself and finish like a champion, whether you’re in first place or the Rote Lanterne, you made it to the end, the Platypus didn’t snack on your ass (and may GG say that it’s looking much smaller in those skinny jeans) and you should be proud of what you’ve accomplished since Jan. 2nd!

As always, may the Füste be with you!

Griswalde “Grolarbär” Grolar

Week 8: Short, sweet and flank meat free

Evening Füsters

Week 8 is here. Unbelievable. And with only 12 days left in WF2020, it’s time to start wrapping things up . . .

• Finish strong.

• Did you RSVP for the Finalfüste yet? If not, why not?

• New bonus on the page. You should know the drill by now.

• This week is the last of the homework. Updated Qualkammer parameter on that page. This weekend’s audit is the last of Winterfüste. As such, it will be intense and worth +5p.

• Drachen slayage starts Sunday. Don’t lose out on a +15p bonus. Send your Drachen proposal to GG now for approval!

• Füste Fatigue. It’s a real thing. You’re almost there. Suck it up.

• DId GG remind you to RSVP? Do you really want to be that person? Do it now.

That’s all GG’s got for you. 12 days. Just 12 more days . . .

GG

Week 7: Flank Meat thinks it sees the light at the end of the tunnel but it's actually the Füste Express on final approach . . .

Füsters . . .

Less than 21 days and counting now as we make our way down the back side of WF2020. So far this Füste has been one for the record books! Most impressively, we’ve only had 7 players drop out over the last six weeks. This represents a fraction of the players who’ve dropped in the past! GG is incredibly impressed by this group of Füsters and is looking forward to a spectacular finish to this year’s game. We have 10-15 players who are still within striking distance of the Bestenfüste crown and at this point it’s any Füster’s game! We’ll all find out together on the evening of March 7th!

• Speaking of March 7th, you should have received an invitation by email to the Finalefüste Finale Konfrontation event (unless you’ve blocked Punchbowl.com’s emails . . . looking at your Gyrfalcon). The event will begin at 5pm at the Finley Community Center. The Finale Konfrontation between the Gruppens will be outdoors (unless weather forces us inside). We will then have food and drink and the awards ceremony after that to celebrate another successful Winterfüste in the books! And for you SoCal players, we’re working on a location for satellite event in your area so more to come on that!

• WK7’s homework parameters are published to the Hausaufgaben page on the website. The next two audits will be worth +3p each so make sure keep up on the homework. It might also help you at the Fianle Konfrontation!

• New Individual Bonus Allowances have been published to the Bonuspunkte page on the website. This includes details on the Drachenfüste Allowance (repeat Füsters will know all about slaying a Drachen!). Make sure to head over to the page and read up on how to earn those bonuspunkte!

• GG is returning to the road this week and there will be a definitive impact on game updates. Please be patient and continue to report each day whether you hear back from GG or not. As in the past, he will get back to you just as soon as he can!

• #TeamPolarbär or #TeamTrueFox? It’s NorCal v SoCal right now at the top of the Bestenliste. Both of these ladies are fierce competitors and GG is looking forward to some serious fireworks as we close the game out! Can one of them take the crown or will someone come up behind them and steal it away at the last moment?!

That’s if for now, everyone. Have a great week and as always, may the Füste be with you!

GG

Week 5: Flank Meat now pacing the room, looking deeply concerned with "the choices you're making" . . .

Alright Füsters, we’ve reached the midpoint of the game and most of you are probably experiencing a little bit of regret today over how you handled your Betrügentag yesterday. Be that as it may, the game now continues into its back half and we now switch focus from starving our flank meat to beating it into submission with more and more Schmerzenfüste!

• It’s time to crank up the pressure with Doppelt Schmerzenfüsten! Starting Monday, Feb. 3rd, you may double your daily workout for double the punkte, four times a week (yes, this is different than past Füstes). Double workouts take two forms. Either complete two single workouts in one day (e.g. run a 5K and swim for 35 minutes) or double a single workout parameter based on the guidelines in the Regelbuch (e.g. run a 10K or walk for 90 min; click here to review the updated Schmerzenfüste section of the Regelbuch). Again, you may do this only four times a week for the next three weeks. Complete a Doppelt workout and earn +2p.

• Because many of you have asked for it, we’re going to continue on with the Fastentag days. So, Wednesday and Friday, earn +0.5 punkte for completing a fast from sun-up to sun-down. No final bonus associated with this, just the daily half punkte bonus. GG’s happy to hear that you’re finding value and results from these intermittent fasting days!

• Homework continues this week with the Wk5 Qualkammer. Click here to check it out. 180 Burpens have been added to the work list so make sure to review the video for proper form. They’re not easy but practice and you’ll get it down. And audits will return next weekend for an increased bonus of +2p for video proof sent to GG.

• New bonuses are now posted (click here). And the Anderefüste Bonus Allowance has reset for February so you may now repeat that bonus.

That’s it for now, Füsters. Outstanding work on the front half of WF2020. Don’t forget that the Finalefüste Event is scheduled for the afternoon of March 7th in the Sonoma area. That’s five weeks from yesterday. Keep up the hard work in the coming weeks and remember, no mercy for the flank meat as it would to the same to you if it could!

And as always, may the Füste be with you . . .

GG

Week 4: Flank Meat up out of bed and on his feet now, declaring this to be "unacceptable behavior" . . .

Three and half weeks into WF2020 and flank meat everywhere is in clear and present danger! GG’s heard rumors of +10 pound losses already (and counting)! This is exactly why we Füste! Keep it up!

Updates:

• Tomorrow begins the incredibly brutal 72 hour “stacked” Hungriger Gheist event. Three full days (starting tonight of midnight) of fasting. Clear liquids only, Master Cleanse drink strongly recommended. Keep a close eye on yourself and make sure you don’t overdue it. Day 2 is usually the most brutal so if you can make it to Wednesday morning, you should be G2G. Remember that each independent day is worth +1p, so if you end only doing one or two days you’ll still earn some bonuspunkte. But you have to do all three if you’re angling for the big bonus on Wednesday at midnight (if you did all six HG days, that is). Good luck all!

• No new bonuses this week. GG’s going to let the game marinate a bit before the halfway point next weekend . . .

• And speaking of the halfway point, couple things to mention. For you Neo-Füstes, the halfway point of the game is also known at your Betrügentag (or “cheat day”) and on this special day you may eat, drink, and lay around like a Fluffenfüste without repercussions. Yes, this means for one day only you can reintroduce back into your body the poisons that are sugar, processed foods and alcohol. But be warned! As many a past Füster has learned the hard way, your system is clean (hopefully) and this toxic krap is going to make you feel far worse than you can ever imagine. So, moderation is the watchword on your Betrügentag. Trust in GG! But there’s the catch this year. As it happens, the Betrügentag often falls on or near the very American “holiday” known as Super Schüssel Sunday (SSS). This is, in fact, scheduled for next Sunday, Feb. 2nd. Because few things bring GG as much pleasure as torturing the Totemfi around this event, he’s got an offer for you. You may choose to take your cheat day on Sunday, watch the game and stuff yourself like a long dog with unlimited access to the chow bowl and no harm will come to you. However, you may alternatively choose to take your cheat day on Saturday Feb. 1st instead and thereby earn yourself a +3p bonus (and obviously the normal Füsting rules are back in effect on Super Schüssel Sunday for anyone who chooses to take this bonus). So it’s up to you: be a gross out American schwein on football day, no problem, you’re covered by the cheat day and you can hog out to your heart’s content. But choose instead to be a smart and strong Füster, deny yourself the gluttonous excesses of SSS (and still cheat to your heart’s content on Saturday!) and you’ll earn a little extra something (and GG’s respect as well). Choose wisely!

• Don’t forget this weekend’s audit is due tonight. Don’t pass up on an easy +1p bonus. Send GG video proof of one Week 3 Qualkammer and earn that bonuspunkte. Techno challenged cause you just can’t be an Apple flavored lemming like the rest of us? Ask GG for the Drop Box link to upload your audit.

• Because GG heard you loud and clear, couple of one day bonuses coming up this week. Apparently the Füsters approve of these time limited bonus events and GG aims to please so stay tuned.

• Travel has been a bit of a bär for GG so far this Füste and for that he apologizes. He’s been on the road a lot more than past Füstes, to include this week. So if you don’t hear back from him, just keep reporting each day as usual and he’ll get back to you when he can. On travel weeks it seems like a game update every 48 hours is establishing itself as the standard. We’ll see.

That’s it for now. Don’t forget to send in your answer to the red rat riddle and your time lapsed meditation video for the +3p bonus. Lot’s more game play to come. Have a great Week 4 and as always, may the Füste be with you (but not your flank meat).

Griswalde Grolar

Week 3: Flank Meat sits up in bed, glares at you accusatorially and silently mouths "what the Füste?"

Hallo Füsters!

Week 3 is here and your flank meat is most likely starting to notice that something isn’t right. After months of gluttonous holiday excess and unconstrained sloth, your body and metabolism should be tightening things up and making that extra meat you’ve been carrying around a little uncomfortable. Good. As Herr Doctor Mediziner Schneebärtchen always said, “Schnönheit its Schmerz” (beauty is pain) and your current and practiced self-destruction is an expression of that beauty.

Now on with some updates:

• FEE PAYMENT: 99% of the you have paid your game fee and GG thanks you for your support of the Füste. The other 1% who are now free loading on GG’s good graces, you will soon be dead to him . . .

• HOMEWORK: It seems that everyone has finally grasped the homework concept and is well at it. Remember, no daily proof (or punkte) is associated with the Qualkammer homework. You earn your +1p reward by completing an audit at the end of the week (audit = video of one Qualkammer). And to that effect, the Week 3 Qualkammer parameter has been updated (click here).

• REPORTING: The Füsters continue to an amazing job at reporting off daily. GG really couldn’t be more pleased. Keep it up. The earlier in the day you report the better (you will never bother GG with an early morning report). One thing of note . . . if you report off late in the day for an isolated bonus activity, you may not see those punkte on that night’s Bestenliste totals. Late punkte is difficult for GG to add to the accounting system on the same day . . .

• BONUSES: New IBA and GBAs have been posted to the Bonuspunkte page (click here).

• HUNGRIGER GEIST: It’s time to ratchet up the general brutality of the fast. This week sees the 48 hour stacked HG experience. Starting tonight at midnight, complete two back to back 24 hour fasts. Earn +1p for each completed day of fasting and take one step closer towards your HG full completion bonus of +5p. And yes, Wednesday and Friday are still Fastentag days with a clear liquid fast from dawn to dusk for +0.5p each.

• HOLIDAY LINK: Tomorrow is MLK Day. Click here and take 15 minutes out of your busy day to watch the iconic “I Have a Dream” speech. No bonus associated with this reflection on social justice. GG will just leave it here for you as needed.

• Did you read this update? Did you really? With Monday’s report off for the weekend, send GG the Herr Doktor Mediziner Schneebartchen’s quote from above and earn a +1p bonus for fully engaging in the Füste.

That’s all for now. Have a great Week 3 and as always, möge die Füste Macht mit dir sein.

Griswalde Grolar

Week 2: Flank Meat Makes Irritated Noise and Rolls Over in Bed

Hallo Füsters!

Thanks for the patience on Friday as GG was on the road. This is going to happen from time to time and is completely unavoidable on his end. Having said that, this coming week is going to be a bit of a schiesse show as GG will be far away in a foreign land (by California standards). Please be patient, report off like normal and GG will get back to you when he can. This means, just like last Friday, you may not hear back from GG between two days of reporting and the Bestenliste may not be updated that night. The Füste is not a boutique service just quite yet . . . we’ll all get there together.

Some finer points to discuss:

• FEE PAYMENT: The Pay to Play link is up on the website (click here to access). If you haven’t already, please pay your game fee by tomorrow night. You can still use Venmo also. As of this morning (Sunday, Jan. 12th), roughly half of you have not paid. Please pay within the next 48 hours or GG will be forced to drop you from the game.

• HOMEWORK: Some clarity on homework. Each day of the week you should be doing three Qualkammers. You can do these in one set or as three separate events (probably easier to just knock them out all at once). You do not need to report off on this daily activity or provide GG with proof and you will not receive any punkte. Confirmation that you are doing your homework comes in the form of the weekend audit (worth +1p on submission). This audit can be submitted anytime on Saturday or Sunday (or even Monday if you’re working the weekend). And yes, I know GG has directed no daily reports on Sunday, but you can still send your audit proof (just don’t expect a response). And very important to note, each week the Qualkammer is going to increase in difficulty so you’ll always want to review the updated requirements on the website before starting each week (click here to review). For instance, the Week 2 Qualkammer has been posted. It’s slightly harder than Week 1 (and yes, next weekend’s audit of one Qualkammer will be to this new Week 2 standard . . . ).

• GENERAL REPORTING: To date, the Füsters of WF2020 have been doing an amazing job with reporting. GG cannot tell you (without tearing up a little) how happy this makes him. When he gets up and checks the Füste communication gear to find that 80% of the players have reported off each morning by 08:30 hours, well, there’s just no way to describe that feeling other than pure elation. Having said that, GG is going to ask you to make one small change to how you’ve been doing things. Please hold all your bonus activity reporting for when you report off on your daily activity. A lot of Füsters like to report bonuses when they happen (and GG totally gets why you’d do this) but it can cause some real confusion on his end and result in bonus points getting missed. So please, hold everything for one daily report. Send all bonus proof (pic/video, whatever) at that time. By doing this, you will assure yourself that all your punkte gets counted and added to your daily total. And as always, please remember, other than your audit proof, no reporting on Sunday (and if you want to hold your audit submission until Monday morning, that’s okay too). All this does not mean that you can’t reach out and communicate with GG as needed on a day to day basis if you have a question, concern etc. He always likes to hear from the Füsters and this new request around reporting structure is not meant to change that.

• BONUSES: New bonuses have been posted to the Bonuspunkte page (click here to review), to include an update to the Gruppen Plankenfüste Allowance (hold time increased from 30 to 40 seconds total).

• If at anytime your punkte total does not seem accurate or matches what you think you should have, please contact GG and let him know. Currently GG is tracking at about a 99% accuracy level but every so often something gets missed unintentionally. Please only file a challenge if you are absolutely certain that GG has missed something.

• Did you read this blog? Did you really? Then on tomorrow’s report off include the word “wissen” and you’ll earn a +1p bonus for doing things right.

• This week has three opportunities to get hangry. Monday is the first full HG Day with a 24 hour fast (starting tonight at midnight). Make sure to review the HG Day requirements in the Regelbuch (click here to review, scroll half way down the page and look for “Fasting, for you GI Pleasure . . .). Then Wednesday and Friday are both Fastentag days with the dawn to dusk clear liquids only fast. You can do all three days if you’re completely masochistic. Or a Narwahl.

• Don’t forget to check your weight today. It’s 10 days into the game and you should have dropped a couple pounds if you’re doing things right. Hopefully you’re starting to pass through the sugar and alcohol detox period and you can see the light on the other side of the tunnel.

That’s all for now. Again, expect regular service interruptions this week with GG on the road. Other than that, have a stupendous Week 2 and as always, may the Füste be with you!

Griswalde Grolar

Week 1: Flank Meat Rubs Eyes and Looks at You Funny

So you made it through the four day introductory period of Week 0, WF2020. Now the real fun begins. Your flank meat is sleepy and snuggly, all curled up around your midsection, butt and thighs after another fabulous holiday season of excess. It’s a little concerned with the last couple of days but fully expects you to break out the Prosecco and a pizza and get dirty with your mouth hole. But your flank meat is in for a very big surprise! because here comes Week 1!

• Everyone did amazing work during the Week 0 introductory phase. GG is quite impressed by what he’s seen so far. Having said that, today is your first rest-day (unless you told or will tell GG that you’re choosing a different day this week). So that means no Schmerzenfüste punkte. But food and drink parameters still apply.

• Your homework starts now. Ss promised, Hausaufgaben begins this week. You will be responsible for completing a set of three Qualkammers each day (except for on your off-day). You may either stack these Qualkammers into a single event or spread them out throughout your day. What’s a Qualkammer? Click here. Probably the easiest way to negotiate this homework assignment is to simply attach it to your daily Schmerzenfüste. Most importantly, how will you prove to GG you’re not a lazy drecksack and you really came here to Füste? Each weekend you will be required to send GG a video audit of one Qualkammer as proof that you mean business. Complete the audit, earn +1p. Easy.

• This week also begins Fastentag play. You’ll remember from studying the Regelbuch (you did read the Rule Book, yes?), that you have the option to fast starting this week. Fastentag is a dawn to dusk fast on every Wednesday and Friday over the next several weeks. Nothing to it. Clear liquids only on the Fastentag days until the sun sets. Complete the daily fast, earn +0.5p. Complete all eight Fastentag days and earn a +5p personal bonus. Now go get hangry!

• So far, you have all done an amazing job reporting off to GG in an organized and timely manner. Couple of points to brush up on. Please hold your daily report until the next day. That means do not report off on a day’s activities that same evening/night. Wait till the next morning. It’s very difficult to track 94 Füsters and if people report the night before then it really throws GG off. Also, remember, no reporting on Sunday. You hold your report for both Saturday and Sunday until Monday morning. You may however report bonus activity on Sunday if you like. GG may or may not respond before Monday.

• New Individual and Gruppen Bonus Allowances have been posted to the website. Click here to check them out. And yes, if a bonus allowance is exercise based, it will count both for your bonus achievement and your daily Schmerzenfüste requirement.

• The Twitter feed remains the primary way to track what’s going on in the game. Besides following GG at @thefuste on Twitter, there’s a standing Twitter feed button at the bottom of each page of the website and there is now a direct feed to the Twitter account on the home page at www.thefuste.com. Check it out now.

• GG is still working on a merchant issue with the website. The pay portal should be open soon. For those of you who have not yet paid, you can pay now using Venmo. Search for @ggrolar. Or you can wait for the portal to become available later this week.

• Percentile Platypus begins his hunt in earnest this week. Any Füster playing below the 70th percentile will find our beaked friend clamped tightly to their hind quarters. If you fall below Percentile Platypus on the Bestenliste, you have 48 hours to get out in front of him. If you can’t or won’t, you’re disqualified from the game. You’ve been warned . . . again.

That’s it for now. Here’s hoping that the Füste finds you healthy and happy this week and that your sugar detox isn’t too violent over the next several days. But if it gets bad, just remember, even astronauts wear diapers sometimes.

May the Füste be with you

Griswalde Grolar